And I am learning to not be married to the numbers.
David told me that a time would come when I look in the mirror and see that I look leaner, but that my numbers will not reflect it. Enter this past Sunday, when everything went up. Weight=up. BF%=up. Tape measurements=up. Clothes=looser. What I see in the mirror=leaner. How does that happen?
I know the concept defies logic, but I have talked to a number of friends in the industry and they all say that this can happen - especially with women (hormonal changes are generally the culprit). I had a ruptured ovarian cyst last week (sorry if that's TMI), so that in addition to the stomach bug could have thrown by body out of whack. However, my workouts were solid, I am adding weight to my lifts even though I am leaning out, and my muscle definition is starting to show (another thing that doesn't make sense with the numbers this past weekend).
There were a few things that happened in response to my body comps this week. First, my reaction was to be disappointed. I started crying, which upset JP. He is still working on how to manage the emotional aspect of all of this, and he did a great job of trying to get me to focus on the positive. I gave myself a small bit of time to process everything and not be happy with it, but was not going to engage in self-pity or let it turn into self-sabotage. There are generally two things I do when I am stressed out - eat and clean. I had just had a meal when we did body comps, so eating was out of the picture. Jenna was still playing in the living room (i.e., one baby wrecking crew) so cleaning wasn't an option. So I went to the gym and did my workout for the day. I knew going into it that my attitude about it would dictate whether I had a good workout or not, so I sought some experience from a friend in the fitness industry, prayed and went and had a great workout. The fallout of the emotional upheaval, even as short as it is, is that I have been tired, struggling with cravings and not wanting to do cardio this week. However, I push forward and I know that these things are only temporary.
As for my coach, he is a minimalist, and he sent a text telling me he wasn't worried about the numbers this week and to stay the course. That minimalist approach works well for me.
I'm practicing my basic front pose a few times a day, and am getting more comfortable with it overall. I can hold the pose for longer periods of time, I'm getting better at flaring my lats without using an inhale as the starting point, which also means that I am learning to hold the pose without holding my breath. Lol I have been bad about setting my right shoulder higher than my left, but this is common posing error, and something that is easy to correct. I have started playing with the other poses, but need to get with my coach about tweeking them. Believe it or not, the front pose is the most difficult to hold. It is also the one I will spend the most time doing.
At the end of the day, I have less than 4 months to go. As I have said before, this seems like such a long period of time, but I also realize that it will pass before I know it. I'm 6 weeks in and amazed at how much my body has changed in that time period. I can only imagine, and anticipate seeing, what the remaining 15.5 weeks will bring.
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