I don't think I have to explain how hard it can be to walk into the gym for the first time - whether the first time ever, the first time in months/years or the first time in days. It's intimidating. Your mind tells you everyone is staring at you. You can't hide from yourself because everywhere you look is a floor to ceiling mirror (except in the cardio section - thank goodness for this...I don't think anyone looks sexy doing cardio!).
And for me, my ego is screaming at me.
Incessant, loud, overpowering. Telling me it's all or nothing. Reminding me of where I once was...
How do I battle the ego? I get my ass in there and I do the work. I remind myself that I once was where I was as a result of hard work. I am not the girl who does cardio for a bit and loses weight. I work out hard 6 days a week and my results come in very small increments. It's why my goals are weight, measurements, and body fat, as well as increases in strength and endurance. I HAVE to monitor multiple areas to see progress sometimes. My experience in the past has taught me that some weeks I don't see a change in the scale, the tape measurements or the body fat percentage, but I do see increases in strength and/or endurance. Some weeks I may see an increase in the scale, but a decrease in measurements. Some weeks I can see any variation of any of these, and it gives me hope because I am not tied to one way of seeing progress. Even though my ego wants to tell me different.
I don't know how it works for other people, but the minute I start moving doing cardio, pushing weights or doing plyometrics, everything gets quiet. And I remember it is not all or nothing. I may not be where I was, but the only way I will get back there is by doing the work. Nothing else. The works shuts up my ego. And I remember that this is my place, my sanctuary, my meditation. This is where I come to decompress, to get it all out. I love the burn. I love the sweat. I love having nothing left at the end. I love walking out the door with my head held high, my ego in check. At least for that day.
Tomorrow is another day. And the ego will start again. One day at a time. One weight at a time. I progress.
How do I battle the ego? I get my ass in there and I do the work. I remind myself that I once was where I was as a result of hard work. I am not the girl who does cardio for a bit and loses weight. I work out hard 6 days a week and my results come in very small increments. It's why my goals are weight, measurements, and body fat, as well as increases in strength and endurance. I HAVE to monitor multiple areas to see progress sometimes. My experience in the past has taught me that some weeks I don't see a change in the scale, the tape measurements or the body fat percentage, but I do see increases in strength and/or endurance. Some weeks I may see an increase in the scale, but a decrease in measurements. Some weeks I can see any variation of any of these, and it gives me hope because I am not tied to one way of seeing progress. Even though my ego wants to tell me different.
I don't know how it works for other people, but the minute I start moving doing cardio, pushing weights or doing plyometrics, everything gets quiet. And I remember it is not all or nothing. I may not be where I was, but the only way I will get back there is by doing the work. Nothing else. The works shuts up my ego. And I remember that this is my place, my sanctuary, my meditation. This is where I come to decompress, to get it all out. I love the burn. I love the sweat. I love having nothing left at the end. I love walking out the door with my head held high, my ego in check. At least for that day.
Tomorrow is another day. And the ego will start again. One day at a time. One weight at a time. I progress.
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