What's the point?

They say life is a journey, not a destination.  Do you ever ask yourself, "What's the point?"

This is a question that has come to mind when I think about this blog - the idea, the implementation of the idea, what I might include, what direction it might take...

Which is exactly the point!  I, like millions of other women, suffer from self-doubt.  I can be overly critical of my body - wanting perfection - and experiencing a great deal of shame because I am no where close to the ideal I would like to have.

Another point is that it takes WORK to achieve an ideal.  It takes work to mold a body, to recover from a lifetime of bad lifestyle choices, to recover from having a baby.  I know some women who naturally bounce back, who lose the weight without too much work, who don't even look like they were even pregnant just weeks (and in some cases, days) after having a baby.  That's not me.  And it's not a lot of women.

When I told my Mom about the idea of starting a blog to record my postpartum recovery, she shared that it might be a bad idea, that maybe I shouldn't openly share something so personal.  I thought about that for a bit, because I was having the same thoughts, but in the end decided that I needed to do this.

So here I am, bearing my soul (and my body) for your inspection, in the hopes that even one woman benefits from me doing so.  And in the process of shedding light on it, I will find purpose and become free of the shame that I feel regarding my body right now.  I will find purpose.

And I will do so in real time...not at the end of the journey...which is extremely difficult because there is no saying, "well, that was me then, BUT look at me now" to make me feel better about it all.  It is me...right here...right now...with all of my imperfections, extra weight - and even self-doubt.

Here I am...this is my work...this is my journey...